WE DETERMINE OUR OWN LIVES

WE DETERMINE OUR OWN LIVES Existentialism argues that we are defined by our existence as humans, and are responsible for finding meaning in our own individual lives. In existentialism, no omnipotent being or force determines a person’s life; rather, it’s up to each individual to set the course through our actions and decisions. We can see how this idea has been passed down through decades of existential thought in this quote, which first appeared in Dostoevsky’s ​​philosophical novel The Brothers Karamazov in 1880 and, in 1945, was used as an epigraph by Simone de Beauvoir: “Each of us is responsible for everything and to every human being.” Or, as Sartre put it: “There is no traced-out path to lead man to his salvation; he must constantly invent his own path. But, to invent it, he is free, responsible, without excuse, and every hope lies within him.” EXISTENTIAL DREAD The flip side of all this individual freedom and responsibility is that it can easily give rise to existential dread, also known as existential angst, anxiety, or anguish — or, in a modern psychological sense, an existential crisis. This arises from the search for meaning in life and confusion around our personal purpose. “Man is condemned to be free,” wrote Sartre, “because once thrown into the world, he is responsible for everything he does.” This freedom can give rise to the dreaded questions of whether life actually has meaning at all, and, if not, why do we go on living? In his 1942 essay The Myth of Sisyphus, Camus posed the disconcerting notion that “judging whether life is or is not worth living amounts to answering the fundamental question of philosophy.” THE ABSURD Another central tenet of existentialism is absurdity — specifically, the absurdity of searching for answers in an answerless world. Take one of the most famous opening sentences in literature: “As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transformed in his bed into a gigantic insect.” The line is fantastic and surreal, but beneath the strangeness of Franz Kafka’s famous short story, “The Metamorphosis,” lies an exploration of alienation and existential anxiety. For Kafka, the human condition is beyond tragic or depressed: It is absurd. Camus, meanwhile, argued that absurdity arises when an individual’s search for order clashes with the world’s inherent lack of order. This is not necessarily a bad thing if we have the courage to accept it, Camus suggested: “Accepting the absurdity of everything around us is one step, a necessary experience: it should not become a dead end. It arouses a revolt that can become fruitful.” WHAT ABOUT GOD? Existentialism can be atheistic, theological, or agnostic. Kierkegaard was intensely religious, despite at times struggling with what that meant, and Paul Tillich was a devout Christian existentialist philosopher. Nietzsche, on the other hand, famously proclaimed that “God is dead,” while Sartre and De Beauvoir were radical humanist atheists. For the existentialists, the freedom of choice to believe or not to believe was more important than faith itself. Sartre saw belief in God as a non-issue: “Existentialism isn’t so atheistic that it wears itself out showing that God doesn’t exist. Rather, it declares that even if God did exist, that would change nothing.” WHAT IS THE MEANING OF LIFE? Existentialism cannot tell us the meaning of life. But if, as they say, we have been thrown into an absurd world, then the existentialists ask us to consider why, by exploring the meaning, purpose, and value of human existence. The philosophy also challenges us to strive for authenticity — to be true to ourselves. The concept of authenticity can vary from one existential philosopher to the next but, generally speaking, inauthenticity involves a form of social conformism and “bad faith,” whereas authenticity requires the individual to own up to their own existence, to accept it and take responsibility for it. This can lead to angst and alienation, but these are accepted as an integral part of authentic living. As for the conclusions of the existentialist philosophers? Well, they are rarely set in stone, like existentialism itself. In Sartre’s Nausea, the main theme is that “existence precedes essence” — that humans do not possess any inherent identity or value, but rather create it themselves as individuals. In Camus’ The Stranger, we see the nakedness of man faced with the absurd. And in Either/Or, Kierkegaard concludes that “there are two possible situations — one can either do this or that. My honest opinion and my friendly advice is this: do it or do not do it — you will regret both.” So, again, don’t expect concrete answers from the existentialists. But perhaps we can take Kafka’s words here as a guidepost for how to think about life, by finding meaning in the simple fact of existence itself. In a heartbreaking letter to his abusive father — a letter his father never even read — Kafka wrote, “It is, after all, not necessary to fly right into the middle of the sun, but it is necessary to crawl to a clean little spot on Earth where the sun sometimes shines and one can warm oneself a little.” Goals We all set certain goals for ourselves, and it’s natural to feel despondent when we fall short of our aspirations. It can be especially frustrating for those of us keeping an eye on the clock, worrying the window to achieve those dreams is closing. But the timelines we set for ourselves are often totally arbitrary, and there’s almost always another day to get where we want to be. Even if/when someone else gets there faster, it’s important to press on toward the finish line at our own pace. Falling behind is a state of mind at the end of the day, and the best cure is maintaining a sense of optimism and determination. So long as we maintain faith in our own abilities, odds are that we’ll eventually find success — even if that success looks different than we’d originally envisioned. Always keep in mind that every person comes with their own unique set of capabilities and circumstances, and no good can come from comparing our personal progress to that of the people around us. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Meaning of Life

What is the meaning of life? What is my fundamental purpose? Why do I exist? If you’ve ever found yourself pondering such questions, you’ve been dabbling in existentialist philosophy. The concept, however, is not easy to define. It can take diverse and sometimes contrasting directions — and many of the major names in existentialism, including Albert Camus and Martin Heidegger, didn’t even accept the label. Existentialism has its roots in the 19th century, with the philosophers Søren Kierkegaard in Denmark and Friedrich Nietzsche in Germany, as well as the Russian novelist Fyodor Dostoevsky. These great thinkers were critical of rationalism and its adherence to pure reason, and instead focused on the question of meaning. One of the earliest statements of existentialist thought comes from a journal entry written by Kierkegaard in 1835: “What I really need is to get clear about what I must do, not what I must know… the crucial thing is to find a truth which is truth for me, to find the idea for which I am willing to live and die.” Existentialism flourished in Europe from around 1930 to the mid-20th century, championed by the likes of Jean-Paul Sartre, Albert Camus, and Simone de Beauvoir, a trio whose frequent meetings in Parisian cafés have become the stuff of literary legend. And while many of the leading existentialists of the 20th century disagreed about its tenets, there are certain shared elements that form the foundation of existentialism today. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Effects of Movies on Living

Growing up, we may have been taught by movies and society that love is a neat and tidy thing, easy to categorize and identify. We find the one person in the world who’s right for us, we instantly click, and if it’s real love, it’s easy sailing from there on out. No fights, no hurt, just bliss. But as we all eventually learn, that idealized version of love doesn’t align with reality. Not only that, but that narrow concept of love totally undersells it. As we’ve written in the past, there are many glorious forms of love, and they all weave colorful threads into the tapestries of our lives. There may be much more to learn (and unlearn) about love than any of us realize. If we’re lucky, we’ll spend our whole lives getting to know the heights and depths of this complicated human feeling. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Tiny Error of Life That Make it Great

Life is full of tiny errors that, while frustrating in the moment, can help us grow as individuals in the long run. These little miscues are essential for our self-education, as nobody starts off knowing everything. But despite the fact that everyone makes mistakes, we often dwell on them for far longer than we should, which can contribute to self-doubt that does more harm than good. It’s important to view mistakes not as personal failings but rather as building blocks for a more complete, well-rounded life. We need to be able to shrug our shoulders, learn whatever lessons present themselves, and look toward the future with a lighthearted attitude instead of continually fretting over the past. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Resiliency

Resiliency is a skill that resides within each of us, though it often requires hardship in order to fully activate. It’s the ability to withstand adversity — to recover emotionally when life deals its blows. The old adage “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade” comes to mind; resilience largely depends on our attitude and mental stamina when confronted with challenging times. The good news is that resilience is a skill that can be developed over time — in fact, that has been scientifically proven to be the case. Studies at the Yale School of Medicine found that the brain is a muscle that can be trained to be more resilient over time. The difference between tending to buckle under pressure and being able to bounce back is related to community, mindfulness, and exercise, among other factors. According to the research, people who are resilient tend to have vast social networks to fall back on, engage in regular physical activity (exercise has been known to decrease stress), and practice keeping their minds trained on the present moment. It can be strengthening to remember that when we experience setbacks and challenges, our ability to bounce back can act as an inspiration to other folks who might be going through tough times. Below, we’ve rounded up 14 quotes that speak to the benefits of resilience, and the importance of finding our way back up after getting knocked down. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Don't Be Paralyzed

We’ve all been paralyzed by overwhelming feelings from time to time: Whether we’re dealing with stress, fear, grief, heartbreak, or low self-confidence, it’s easy to get mired in our emotions and to struggle to break free. Feeling our emotions is a great thing, though — it’s much healthier to work through our difficult feelings than to suppress them, which will only cause them to resurface more intensely in the future. But the key phrase here is “work through”; we must do the work to feel, process, and release these emotions and not allow them to hold us back from what lies ahead. When we’re stuck in our feelings without a clear path forward, sometimes all we need is a little jolt to change our perspective and to remind us of all the good things that await us on the other side of our seemingly insurmountable feelings. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Farewell

Bidding farewell to the familiar and embracing change is always difficult to some degree, especially later in life once we’ve settled further into our habits and routines. But our golden years often leave us no choice but to adapt, even if we’d rather stay the course. Maybe we have to come to terms with retiring after 50 years, or cope with losing a loved one we’ve known since childhood — either way, when such events happen, the best thing we can do is face them head-on. Knowing that change is inevitable, we’re left with two choices. We can fear it, deny it, and run from it, or we can open our minds to it and grow. If we choose the latter, we may find ourselves surprised at just how much that mindset can enrich our lives. After all, age is just a number, and whether we’re 8 or 80, we can always learn new skills. And of course, change doesn’t necessarily have to be the result of a traumatic event. It can also mean picking up that hobby we’ve always thought about trying or selling our home and living in an RV like we’ve always dreamed about. It boils down to being willing to take that first step and walk forward into the unknown with an optimistic outlook. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

New Things

We have so many ways of marking new beginnings: a new year on the calendar, a wedding, the birth of a child. Life is full of monumental fresh starts, but the truth is that new beginnings can happen any time, anywhere. At any moment in the day we can choose to take a deep breath and set an intention to do things differently, to make good choices, to appreciate the people in our lives. You can do it right now. Breathe in. Breathe out. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Sticking Together

In an era when many workplaces are remote, when we can order our groceries online and we hardly have to leave our homes for anything, it can be all too easy to isolate ourselves from others. But it’s crucial to remember that we humans are social creatures by nature, wired for connection and with a deep need for community. As the Jacobean poet John Donne once wrote, “No man is an Island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the Continent, a part of the main.” In other words, we rely on each other. We need one another to fulfill our basic needs for love and connection, to provide purpose and meaning in our lives, and to fall back on when times get hard. Our ability to collaborate and cooperate with one another has led to some of humanity’s greatest accomplishments. It’s only by remaining united in the face of obstacles that seek to divide us that we can continue to strive toward a brighter future. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Courage

Summoning courage is often easier said than done. We can prepare for a test, a job interview, a date, or an audition to the best of our abilities, but when the time comes to actually prove ourselves, we may still feel or show signs of fear. This is natural, and in fact, it’s a sign that we’re moving in the right direction. As Amy Poehler once said, “Being nervous is great! How often do we get nervous on a daily basis? Being slightly nervous means you care, and you’re alive, and you’re taking some kind of risk. Hooray for being nervous!” Even if nerves are a good thing, though, it’s not easy to muster the bravery required to override them and get to whatever lies on the other side. This is the test we must pass over and over again to unlock the most valuable parts of life. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Reaction to Life

There are two ways to react when life throws unexpected challenges our way: We can always dig in our heels and refuse to budge, but remaining close-minded and stubborn rarely helps anyone develop into a better version of themselves. On the other hand, striving to stay flexible and open-minded is one of the most appealing qualities a person can have, and a willingness to adapt on the fly will almost certainly help lead us down better and brighter paths. This doesn’t necessarily mean we should immediately accept all the new ideas presented to us, as it’s good to be discerning and there will still be times when it’s best to stick to our initial plans. But we should always be open to hearing people out and changing our minds if it seems wisest to do so. This allows us all to see from new perspectives and make informed decisions about the best ways to proceed. If we keep our minds tightly shut to other voices besides our own, ignorance may win out and ultimately hold us back from realizing our full potential. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Life is...

Life is a magnificent adventure. It is so magical, it shall never let you suffer. You should always catch a miracle or as many as you need for that is God's work. Never worry about things you can't control. Just the present. Be as delightful as possible in your endeavors. #BeNoteWorthy #piccadillyinc yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Routines in Life

Routines and careful planning have their place in life, to be sure. But for those of us who tend to adhere a bit too closely to our lists and schedules, living our lives so rigidly can prevent us from enjoying the spice of life. It can be difficult to break free of our self-imposed guidelines, but incorporating more spontaneity into our lives can help us feel a whole new type of fulfillment. These spur-of-the-moment decisions don’t have to be anything enormous. For example, we might try taking a different route home from work and eat at a new restaurant we find along the way. Even these small deviations from our norm can allow us to unlock exciting new possibilities. Still, there’s a balance to be struck between spontaneity and discipline; being impulsive all the time is obviously irresponsible and can lead us into trouble. But there’s an interesting relationship between routine and surprise, as we often can’t have one without the other. If we don’t take care to have our finances in order, for instance, it may not be possible to splurge on that last-minute vacation with our friends. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Inspiration

It has been well established by science that humans possess an intrinsic instinct for mimicry. Frown at someone, and they will often glower back. Smile and you’re likely to inspire a reciprocal grin. A similar theory underlies the power of positive thinking: When we consciously choose to introduce a positive thought into our minds, our bodies respond instinctively.Positive thinking can reduce stress, improve immunity, and even make us more resilient in the face of adversity. When our bodies get the signal from our brains that all is well, they, in turn, signal our brains to feel more content. It’s a positive feedback cycle that can be quite powerful.Of course, it’s important to acknowledge that life will have its ups and downs, but if we can try to see the low points as part of the normal fluctuations that we all experience, we can turn our focus toward the positive, and help ourselves move in the direction of the things we want. More than anything, positive thinking is about setting intention and being open to possibility.

Alone and Lonely differences

Ask any introvert and they’ll tell you: There’s a difference between being alone and being lonely. But you don’t need to be an introvert to enjoy the solitary pleasure of doing your own thing on your own schedule — the blissful freedom and peace that come from spending time alone.Sometimes being alone can be a way for us to refill our emotional well and give time and space to our thoughts without the buzz of activity that having other people around can bring. It’s also an important step in developing a creative mind.Neuroscientists have discovered that by directing our focus inward during times of solitude, we’re using a different brain network than when we’re engaging with others and directing our attention outward. But it isn’t only artists and creators who can benefit from solitary reflection. We learn about ourselves when we choose to spend time alone — it gives us a chance to explore our thoughts and interests and develop a stronger sense of our own identity.Whether you live for those times when you can be by yourself or you simply crave a few solitary moments before diving back into the wild rumpus of social life, these quotes about being alone will remind you that, sometimes, we are our own best company.

Age

Getting older is inevitable, but in a world where the word “aging” is usually prefaced with “anti,” it can be difficult to enjoy the process, as normal and natural as it is. Yet there are many benefits to getting older: With age come experience, wisdom, and an opportunity to live more intentionally and enjoy every day.

“As I go on in life and I feel more and more myself and less judgmental about myself, my values become clearer to me,” Gwyneth Paltrow once said, highlighting a hopeful way to think about aging. “I can be in integrity all the time, which is much harder when you’re younger.”With a slight shift in perspective, it’s possible to see all the positives that come along with moving up in years. It can be helpful to remember that not everyone gets the chance to age as far into life as others, and that we should cherish the time as we have it.

Limitations are Guidelines

Marlene

We all face limitations, but let us consider them guidelines, not barriers. Think of them as gentle nudges that shape our unique journeys, guiding and supporting us along the way. Everyone encounters obstacles, but how we navigate them defines our path.

Consider life's guidelines like a map: they provide direction but don't dictate every step. Embrace your limitations as part of your story, using them to fuel your determination and creativity. It's these qualities that will help you navigate the map of life, even when the path seems unclear.

Open Your Mind and Heart

Marlene

Viewing life as a gift opens up a world of possibilities and opportunities. It encourages us to appreciate every moment and recognize the potential within ourselves.When we see life through this lens, we feel a profound gratitude that fuels our desire to grow and give back. Each day becomes a chance to become a better version of ourselves, learn, and contribute to the world.By embracing this perspective, we empower ourselves to make positive changes, not just for our benefit but also for others. This sense of responsibility to give back transforms our actions, leading us to create meaningful connections and leave a lasting impact.Remember, the true beauty of life lies in the joy of becoming more and sharing that growth with others. Seize the day with a grateful heart and a mindset ready to give back, and watch how life's gifts multiply.