An Angels Attitude

Brian G. Jett

Every morning it is the same routine. She wakes up, gives a big yawn, and heads downstairs in the same old uniform. Not a glamorous job at all. Others might think that being a ballerina instructor to be the perfect job or career. Dance, stretch and teach others to dance and stretch their imaginations.

Remarkable lady, this gal is, however, she does the same old thing but to her it always appears to be somehow new - each and every single day.

Don't get me wrong as she has her moments like I suppose we all do. She gets frustrated over the little stuff. Seems the biggest difference between this young woman and others that I have observed is the way she takes life in stride. In a nutshell, she just doesn't let anything or anyone break her stride.

Like a beautiful mare dancing in the wide open spaces in a dazzling display right after an equaling dazzling dawn, nothing that might present itself as an obstacle can break her stride. At least this is how it appears right now in her dancing career.

Can I ask you a question? Don't mean to be nosey or anything, but what uniform do you put on everyday? Whether a ballerina outfit or waitress uniform, I suppose any position can lose its once highly esteemed luster after a bit.

This little ballerina, unlike so many others with differing uniforms, can't stand having to go to bed but can't wait to get out of it in the morning. She works from home, so she is afforded the opportunity each Tuesday morning to gaze out of her front storm door at the men who pick up her hurby-curby.

Kind of a drab, off green colored uniform these guys wear, but she enjoys this special time at the door as a highlight of her daily existence. She likes to make their jobs less repetitive as she musters up a big smile and gives them all a huge grin - all the while waving like it might be her last chance to do so.

Don't get me wrong because as we all know way too well, no one is perfect and she'll be the first to admit it. She says, "I'm sorry" with more sincerity than most I've met six times her age.

Sometimes I can't help but think that as soon as this or that change occurs in my life, all will be just a tad bit better. I think that she has learned a powerful lesson and it has to do with perception. The way she has chosen to perceive things, is the way she receives things.

She just hasn't allowed herself to see too many rainy days and Mondays, and the ones she has, clearly haven't ever ruined her morning, afternoon, or evening routine. Those 25 years her elder might be creating some chaos around her, but again, it doesn't seem to break her stride. She just keeps on dancing nonetheless.

In talking to her recently, she spoke of her plans for the future but even as she did she kept some semblance of her dancing going. If reminded of a mistake she made yesterday, she'll just give me a demure little smile as though I'm purposefully trying to be a kill-joy.

Hmmmmmm. I hadn't given that much thought until now, but why do I or any of us rehash another's past?

Good question and this wise little gal seems to know most of the answers. I guess longevity doesn't always equate to legitimacy.

I hope that she'll keep her job as a ballerina for many years to come so that I can keep learning simple life lessons from her. But I doubt that she will, if I look at the big picture or project way into the future like I too often tend to do.

Nothing I could say or anything any of her other best friends could say could break her stride. She is destined for great things. Even if she some day changes from her ballerina outfit to a waitresses uniform, I kind of think she'll keep her bright attitude, fresh perspective, and unsophisticated purity.

Well, that's all I have to write about for now. I'd best get home before my wife helps her take off her ballerina uniform and get ready for bed. If I'm so blessed, I'll get to watch her dance and sing for me right before she says, "I love you daddy" as I walk out the door for work in the morning.

I wish I could take such moments and put them in a jar. I wish I could stop the world from turning and keep things just the way they are. I know that I can't, but I can always wish I could.

Life is...

Life is a vast yielding of open- ended questions? The more you get answered a ton more come to light. #piccadillyinc yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

The Art Of Being Well

If you don't want to be ill...

...Speak Your Feelings.

Emotions and feelings that are hidden, repressed, end in illnesses as: gastritis, ulcer, lumbar pains, spinal. With time, the repression of the feelings degenerates to the cancer. Then, we go to a confidante, to share our intimacy, ours "secret", our errors! The dialogue, the speech, the word, is a powerful remedy and an excellent therapy!

If you don't want to be ill...

...Make Decisions.

The undecided person remains in doubt, in anxiety, in anguish. Indecision accumulates problems, worries and aggressions. Human history is made of decisions. To decide is precisely to know to renounce, to know to lose advantages and values to win others. The undecided people are victims of gastric ailments, nervous pains and problems of the skin.

If you don't want to be ill...

...Find Solutions.

Negative people do not find solutions and they enlarge problems. They prefer lamentation, gossip, pessimism. It is better to light a match that to regret the darkness. A bee is small, but produces one of the sweetest things that exist. We are what we think. The negative thought generates negative energy that is transformed into illness.

If you don't want to be ill...

...Don't Live By Appearances.

Who hides reality, pretends , poses and always wants to give the impression of being well. He wants to be seen as perfect, easy-going, etc. but is accumulating tons of weight. A bronze statue with feet of clay. There is nothing worse for the health than to live on appearances and facades. These are people with a lot of varnish and little root. Their destiny is the pharmacy, the hospital and pain.

If you don't want to be ill...

...Accept.

The refusal of acceptance and the absence of self-esteem, make us alienate ourselves. Being at one with ourselves is the core of a healthy life. They who do not accept this, become envious, jealous, imitators, ultra-competitive, destructive. Be accepted, accept that you are accepted, accept the criticisms. It is wisdom, good sense and therapy.

If you don't want to be ill...

...Trust.

Who does not trust, does not communicate, is not opened, is not related, does not create deep and stable relations, does not know to do true friendships. Without confidence, there is not relationship. Distrust is a lack of faith in you and in faith itself.

If you don't want to be ill...

...Do Not Live Life Sad.

Good humor. Laughter. Rest. Happiness. These replenish health and bring long life. The happy person has the gift to improve the environment wherever they live. "Good humor saves us from the hands of the doctor". Happiness is health and therapy.

Dr. Dráuzio Varella

Labels

Marlene

Do outward appearances tell the whole story about someone? I don’t think so; in fact, I know they don’t. I know that people have a real depth to them that may be revealed either willingly or in times of crisis or stress and even then, it may not be the whole picture. Sometimes, we as people, get things wrong about others.

Has anyone ever unfairly labeled you? If they have, I would bet that you try not to do it to others. Why? Because it’s hurtful.

May I suggest that today you open your mind and heart a bit further and think the best of others, knowing that they have had a life you know nothing about, even when you know them well. Remember, labels are for cans, not for people.

Take Charge

Marlene

Be in charge of your life.  Don't worry about what other people are doing because they have their own life to live. 

 

Please remember: The pandemic is affecting everyone, so please be kind to others, stay safe, stay informed, and stay strong! We are all in this together.

Mentor

Marlene

Everyone needs a mentor at some point in their life. Maybe you’ve had one in the business world or in your personal life. Most times you will develop a bond with them as they share their experiences and bring positive influences into your life.

Now may be the time to reach out to someone who could use a little help; someone you could mentor.

What a great way to give a gift to them and yourself!

Principles Of Life

• Winning isn't everything but wanting to win is.
  
  
• You would achieve more, if you don't mind who gets the credit.
  
  
• When everything else is lost, the future still remains.
  
  
• Don't fight too much or the enemy will know your art of war.
  
  
• The only job you start at the top is when you dig a grave.
  
  
• If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for everything.
  
  
• If you do little things well, you'll do big ones better.
  
  
• Only thing that comes to you without effort is old age.
  
  
• You won't get a second chance to make a first impression.
  
  
• Only those who do nothing do not make mistakes.
  
  
• Never take a problem to your boss unless you have a solution.
  
  
• If you are not failing, you're not taking enough risks.
  
  
• Don't try to get rid of your bad temper by losing it.
  
  
• If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
  
  
• Those who don't make mistakes usually don't make anything.
  
  
• There are two kinds of failures: Those who think and never do, and those who do and never think.
  
  
• Pick battles big enough to matter, small enough to win.
  
  
• All progress has resulted from unpopular decisions.
  
  
• Change your thoughts and you change your world.
  
  
• Understanding proves intelligence, not the speed of the learning.
  
  
• There are two kinds of fools in this world.: Those who give advice and those who don't take it.
  
  
• The best way to kill an idea is to take it to a meeting.
  
  
• Management is doing things right. Leadership is doing the right things.
  
  
• Friendship founded on business is always better than business founded on friendship.

Compiled by Tony Peeris --- India

Focus on the Good

Marlene

Can you stay focused on the good? I know that sometimes you can't quite see it in these circumstances we find ourselves in, yet something good will come out of this. 

 

Know that I have you on my mind and ask the powers that be to bless you more than you could possibly believe and keep you safe and strong!

Looking

Marlene

They say it's all in how you look at things - glass half empty or half full. Do you criticize or encourage? Are you stuck in yesterday or are you looking forward to today? How long have you ready to go for your dreams? If you look for what could go right and you're halfway there.

 

Don't stand in your own way, any more.

 

It's going to be a great day, let's go!

Inner Voice

Marlene

Your own inner voice knows the way that’s right for you. Are you listening to it or something else?

Be strong, be wise, be that positive person no matter what.

Chances

Marlene

Yes, chances come and go, that’s true. What about those you aren’t aware of because you didn’t even try?

This week, I hope you make a commitment to be open to possibilities. Most things will not be handed to you in life; you have to work for them. Don’t be afraid to fail when trying something new. That’s part of the process you have to go through. You’re trying; you’re putting yourself in a position to find new opportunities that may not seem obvious.

Keep going – don’t give up. You’ve got this, if you keep doing the work.

Here’s to you today! Shine bright and be involved in the direction of your life.

Keeping Cool

Marlene

Arguing and fighting will land a hockey player in the penalty box giving the opposing team an advantage. These players know the consequences of letting their emotions get the better of them. How about you?  Can you see how keeping your cool is a powerful tool in your toolbox?

How to deal with disappointment

A husband got into big trouble after his wedding anniversary. His wife told him the day before, "Tomorrow there better be something in the driveway for me that goes from zero to 200 in 2 seconds."

The next morning the wife went outside and found a small box in the driveway. She opened it and found a bathroom scale.

All throughout life we all deal with some type of disappointment, whether it is disappointment from our job, family or friends. Disappointment is inevitable. It is not a matter of "if" it comes, it is "when" it comes.

Several days before my 15th birthday, my dad informs me that they have bought me a car. You can imagine the excitement I felt. He went on to say that it was being delivered on the morning of my birthday. I walked around to cloud nine and remember thinking, "Oh man, only rich people get their cars delivered to them; this must be quite the car!"

That morning, I stood in my parents' driveway waiting for my car to arrive. My heart is pounding against my chest, in my mind I picture a red convertible sports car and can feel the wind blowing through my hair as I take that baby from 4th to 5th gear. I can hear the duel exhaust screaming as I put the accelerator to the floor. I got excited!!

Several minutes later, I notice a tow truck coming down the street and to my amazement the driver pulled into my parent's drive way. It wasn't my beautiful red sports car, it wasn't car at all. I figured the tow truck driver had made a wrong turn and needed directions.

I walked up to the truck and in my most polite tone asked if I could help him. He said is he was looking for-and gave my address. I can only assume that all the blood must've drained from my face, because the driver asked if I was okay.

I couldn't believe it! It wasn't a red sports car like I had pictured in my mind. Instead, on the back of this tow truck sat a hideous, multi-colored, 1972 Ford Courier pick up truck. "You've got to be kidding me, is this some kind of cruel joke?"

When I say multi-colored, this truck had approximately 20 different colors on it. This truck had no idea what color it wanted to be. It was used for the paint shop of the auto repair facility where my dad worked and there are no words to describe the ugliness of this truck.

My dad walked out of the house and gave directions where the monster was to be released. Evidently my dad saw the disappointment in my face and told me that we had one year to work on the truck and get it in tip-top shape. I was disgusted!

Through out the next year I would work on my truck every afternoon and every weekend. It took forever to remove all the paint. One year later, after many hours of labor, we hadn't gotten to the painting stage but at least all the dents were straightened and running. The truck was a beautiful brown primer color. The only way to get a shine on this truck was spray the primer with water and admire it before the water dried.

The moment had finally arrived. With great pride I slid the key in the ignition and to no avail, if didn't start! Pounding the steering wheel in anger, I remember thinking, "This is NOT happening!"

Finally, my dad and I managed to get it running again and off I went for my first adventure in my "new" truck. After a quick stop to pick up a good friend, we were out on the town in the brown beast. I drove around for several hours and we started for home. The truck ran for a grand total of 5 hours and left me sitting on the side of the highway. I remember thinking and feeling this has to be the worse birthday in history.

I have learned through experience that there is something to learn from all our disappointment. It is through disappointment that we are strengthened. It is up to us to find the good in every bad situation. Instead of asking "why me?" start asking "what can I learn from this?" In every disappointment there is a lesson to be learned. However, it is up to you to look for the lesson.

You may be wondering what that hideous truck taught me.

I'm not sure what it taught me. One thing I do know for sure is that truck brought closeness between me and my dad that never before existed. It gave me an opportunity to actually learn who my dad was a person. We spent many hours together working on the truck and it gave him the opportunity to do what he loved to do, work on a vehicle and teach his son some valuable lessons about life. I didn't realize all this at the time, but as I sit here and write this, it has opened my eyes to the realization that my dad wasn't that bad after all.

No matter how much disappointment comes into your life, look through it and find the positive lessons within. You are a strong willed individual and you have the ability to overcome any and all obstacles that come into your path of life. You can overcome any form of disappointment and can become a stronger, smarter and a more confident person. I have faith in you and your ability to overcome.

Copyright © 2008 Bobby Cary II
Bobby Cary is an inspirational/motivational speaker, writer and life coach. Throughout his life, Bobby has faced many set backs. Growing up with a severe speech impediment along with a learning disability and a behavior disorder, he has a tremendous amount of experience in Overcoming Adversity.

Escape

Does it seem like a lot more people are trying to escape reality during this pandemic and lock down? It's hard to grasp at times the enormity of the situation worldwide.

Survival

 

Marlere

Here you are, in the middle of a pandemic, wondering what's going to happen. I wish I could predict the future but I can't. I do know this - you're probably going through your own storm right now.

What will you do? How will you get through this? Will life ever be the same?

I have hope and faith that we will get through this together by helping one another. Do what you can to help your local businesses. Reach out to your neighbors and friends. Don't mentally isolate yourself from others. Be creative. Be grateful. Use this time to grow in ways that will help your life, not hurt your life.

Please remember:the pandemic is affecting everyone, so please be kind. Stay safe, stay informed, and stay strong! You will make it and you will thrive!

Life is Magnificently Beautiful

All life matters. It is beautiful to be alive. Moments come and go, so we have to cherish them while they are present. We need to be thoughtful, caring, but most of all loving to one another. If we love eachother no matter what our past, our future will shine as brightly as a star.

#piccadillyinc 

Fabric of Our Life

This fabric of our lives gets stronger as we age. The more people we meet, the more places we go, the more ideas we have; the stronger we have become. For a newborn they have to have a strong foundation either from family's, friends, or society. Society is a friend that always accepts you no matter what you have done. It just wants you to be happy and have fun living your life for it knows when we are happy, you shall make others as happy as you are if not more.

With every friend you make you weave yourself a stronger fabric of life. This fabric shall never end. It just keeps going and going. Now with every generation it may take on a slightly different attribute than it had prior. However it shall always be, no matter what.

#piccadillyinc

Doing Right

Whether you are a manager of business, your family, or your own life, acknowledge the right thing. People will respond positively and feel that they are making a contribution.

 

If you criticize rather than engage, you probably won't get the outcome you anticipated. Why? People are creatures of emotions.

Think of how you feel when someone criticizes you or your work - not too good. So catch people doing something right and see what happens.

Reopenings

Marlene

Many parts of the world have or are starting to reopen though the pandemic Covid-19 virus is still active. Numbers have dropped in many areas and some are spiking again. It is an unsettling time that we are in, yet we have to move forward with hope and confidence that it will all work out. I want to thank you for your motivation, inspiration, and concern for all who are fighting this battle.

Today - more positive news! I invite you to read stories from the sports world and how so many are helping out during this time of extreme need.

Good News From Yahoo Sports
https://sports.yahoo.com/sports-good-news-tracker-during-coronavirus-covid-19-pandemic-211306589.html

Change

Marlene

Have you ever tried to make a change in your life and it didn't quite work? Why was that?  Possibly, Tony Robbins' success leaves clues.

Change is hard to do, yet many people have done it so you can too.

There's nothing magical or mysterious here - identify what you want to demand of yourself, make the commitment and do the work. 

You were meant to have a life that you are proud of.  Keep going, you're going to succeed!

Choose Joy

Marlene Remember this: This is your life and you get to choose how you feel about it. Choose joy and your life goes one way. Choose bitterness and it goes another way. Life is short, decide then move forward. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Volunteer

Marlene

Today lets thank those who are volunteering right now during this crisis. You know who they are - they are your friends, neighbors, relatives, people in your community who are working tirelessly to help others. Sometimes we forget about the importance of their missions.

 

Thank you to those who provide comfort to those going through hospice, those who are delivering food to seniors and those with compromised immunity systems; to the foster parents of cats and dogs, those who make masks or start a food cupboard for their neighborhood. The list goes on and on.

 

Know that the volunteers are in our hearts and thoughts and we are grateful for all they do.  Here's to those who serve!

Time - One Of The Most Important Things In Life

Marlene

 

(A young man learns what's most important in life from the guy next door.)

 

It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man; college, girls, career, and life itself got in the way.

 

In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could stop him.

 

Over the phone, his mother told him, "Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday." Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days.

 

"Jack, did you hear me?"

 

"Oh, sorry, Mom. Yes, I heard you. It's been so long since I thought of him. I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago," Jack said.

 

"Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it," Mom told him.

 

So what will Jack do? Let's find out!

 

Time - One Of The Most Important Things In Life
https://motivateus.com/stories/have-you-learned-this-yet.htm

 

Right now we have been given a gift of time.  I know you are using it wisely.  Have a great day and stay safe.  Remember we are all in this together!

Good News

Marlene 

I enjoy bringing Good News for you to read, especially in today's times, and actively search it out.  Today we look at Spotlighting Phoenix’s positivity during the pandemic.

We're talking about the positive stories that are taking place during this pandemic. The acts of kindness that make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Because, believe it or not, it's not all doom and gloom. Good news stories are out there. And they're plentiful. 

 The link is to a podcast and there is also a transcript, if you prefer. Here it is: Spotlighting Phoenix

Thank you Mom

Marlene

A Big Thank You to all the Moms, no matter where they are, for the gifts they have given to us. Without Mothers, none of us would be here. I know I sure miss mine right now and if yours is gone, maybe you're missing her too. 

 For all the Moms who are working each day to keep their families together and safe, thank you!! Have a Happy Mother's Day! 

Before we leave today, here's a positive article that pays tribute to good deeds and kindness. Did their moms teach them these virtues? You never know :-)  Good Deeds and Acts of Kindness The Tulsa Way

Into The Unknown

You don't know what to expect when you wake up. Every moment is a new adventure. Every moment can be different than the last.

An adventure is awaiting us all in the future, however which future is the adventure in. You have many futures you can live out. Every choice you make, you can make authentic choices for the future. If you are happy within the moment, you have a precious gift.

Happiness leads to optimism and good fortune. There may be sadness out there, but all you have to do is understand. 

#piccadillyinc 

Permanence

Nothing in the world is permanent. Not even this message. The only permanence is our hope's for a brighter future. Then again, we are so divided who knows what will happen to us. This planet has been here long before us and will outlive us all. Sad to say but all the squabbles you do diminishes your life span exponentially. So be happy in the time you have allotted to you and make others feel worthwhile as well. For without your human family you would not be here as well as never feel loved and wanted as you do right now. Time is the only permanence, until we learn to harness time, dare I say manipulate it, we shall fall victim to it. I don't like being the victim, do you? I don't think we have to exploit time, just find a beneficial way to coexist with it. We need time as much as it needs us. #piccadillyinc yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Nucleus of Life

You can be a part of many circles in your life, but what really makes you happy as a person? What can you offer that no one else has done before, what is your real gift you bring to this human family or in fact this cosmic family that we are just adapting to as I write this. There are so many aspects to emerge in this cosmic realm. Are we important at all? Does anything we do really matter. Of course it does. If you make someone or some other thing happy in your life, you have made a vast improvement on the likes of which you cannot even grasp. Will you be able to see the change you are making in all this chaotic minutia known as life, maybe, but that is not the point, the point is to make each and every moment you have last as long as it can, because there is one thing you can't buy and that is time. #piccadillyinc yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Spreading the Love! 25 Heartwarming Acts of Kindness Sparked by the COVID-19 Crisis

Marlene The coronavirus crisis has changed our world and the way we live in unprecedented ways. Thousands of lives have been lost. Millions are unemployed. So much has been placed on pause. And in the midst of it all we are isolated, unable to connect in person with our loved ones. Yet there is one powerful, simple way that we can be united and uplifted in deeply meaningful ways: through kindness. Countless acts of kindness — small and grand — are coming from every corner of the country. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Mindfulness

Marlene

What Is Mindfulness? According to the Oxford Dictionary, mindfulness is a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.

Okay, after reading quite a few articles about mindfulness, I came upon two resources that I liked (and there are many more). The purpose of being mindful is to manage stress - which most people are experiencing right now.

Healing Words

Marlene 

I have told my children this every day since they were born. I told them if they learned one new thing every day and were nice to just one person every day, that at the end of the year they would have learned 365 new things and blessed 365 fellow humans. Now they are older and have become very considerate and kind human beings and told me that this has become their creed. 

Is this something you do in your life? 

Please remember that there is beauty, kindness, care and love alive around the world. Feel the goodness and positive energy, share that feeling with others today.

Stay safe, stay strong, stay home and thank you for doing your part. It's not that hard when you do it from your heart.

Free

You are free to entertain yourself a long as you do not harm others. You can read, write, create, converse with others for enjoyment. Your enjoyment is essential to your well-being as well  as the well-being of many different communities you belong to. Be daring. Be adventurous. Be creative. Live your life in the now. Do what you are willing to do, and let it be fulfilling enough for yourself.

Happiness

Is happiness a possibility? What are you striving for in life? What makes you happy one moment may not make you happy the following moment?

Being content and being fulfilled are similar to being happy, but can also be totally different. We all have aspirations, goals, and dreams and those are what makes us unique individual people who encompass this great world. But why do we restrict ourselves by saying "Oh, that's wrong," or "You can't do that." How about be uplifting as well as positive. For example, you could hold a door open for someone or make a card for a friend or just visit some people you haven't seen in a while and talk about stuff you did and stuff you remember. Remembering the past grounds you and makes you a stronger person. Your scars may hurt when you get them, but when you learn their lesson that they have been sent to you to teach, you are free to live, grow, and be happy.

Forgiveness

We all have this power. Look at all our adventures in the past and how we managed to forgive rather than hold a real grievance. Only you have the power to protect yours and what you see as family and yes even our Earthly as well as cosmic family.

Until we can come to terms with that inner anger we can not reach the magnitudes of grandeur that has been placed at our feet.

It's important to learn from the past, but once it's dealt with, let it go, don't let it consume you. Only you have the power to choose your path, others may influence it, but in the end it your choice to go down that road and embark on that adventure known as life.

#piccadillyinc

Powerful Words

( During very difficulty times, we tend to forget that life has its ups and downs, causing us to lose ourselves in the process. It is completely okay to feel upset, but during those times we have to remember to search for the voice inside that tells us that we can and will survive through anything. - Take care, Jesse Marie ) 

I love when contributors like Jesse Marie add a bit of an enrichment to why they either came up with the quote or picked a certain one to send in.

Words can be so powerful, so be sure you are filling your minds with positive messages right now. If you find you're getting a stressed out, take a deep breath and try to relax. No one needs to watch the news all the time. Exercise; move around in your place. Be nice to yourself.

Think Kind Thoughts

Taking time to think kind thoughts about yourself and loved ones has psychological and physical benefits, new research suggests.

A study by the Universities of Exeter and Oxford has found that taking part in self-compassion exercises calms the heart rate, switching off the body's threat response. Previous studies have shown that this threat response damages the immune system. Researchers believe the ability to switch off this response may lower the risk of disease.

In the study, published in the journal Clinical Psychological Science, 135 healthy University of Exeter students were divided into five groups, and members of each group heard a different set of audio instructions. The team took physical measurements of heart rate and sweat response, and asked participants to report how they were feeling. Questions included how safe they felt, how likely they were to be kind to themselves and how connected they felt to others.
The two groups whose instructions encouraged them to be kind to themselves not only reported feeling more self-compassion and connection with others, but also showed a bodily response consistent with feelings of relaxation and safety. Their heart rates dropped and the variation in length of time between heartbeats -- a healthy sign of a heart that can respond flexibly to situations. They also showed lower sweat response.
Meanwhile, instructions that induced a critical inner voice led to an increased heart rate and a higher sweat response -- consistent with feelings of threat and distress.
First author Dr Hans Kirschner, who conducted the research at Exeter, said: "These findings suggest that being kind to oneself switches off the threat response and puts the body in a state of safety and relaxation that is important for regeneration and healing."
Lead researcher Dr Anke Karl, of the University of Exeter, said: "Previous research has found that self-compassion was related to higher levels of wellbeing and better mental health, but we didn't know why.

"Our study is helping us understand the mechanism of how being kind to yourself when things go wrong could be beneficial in psychological treatments. By switching off our threat response, we boost our immune systems and give ourselves the best chance of healing. We hope future research can use our method to investigate this in people with mental health problems such as recurrent depression."
The recordings that encouraged self-compassion were a "compassionate body scan" in which people were guided to attend to bodily sensations with an attitude of interest and calmness; and a "self-focused loving kindness exercise" in which they directed kindness and soothing thoughts to a loved one and themselves.
The three other groups listened to recordings designed to induce a critical inner voice, put them into a "positive but competitive and self-enhancing mode," or an emotionally neutral shopping scenario.
All the audio recordings were 11 minutes long.
While people in both the self-compassion and positive but competitive groups reported greater self-compassion and decreased self-criticism, only the self-compassion groups showed the positive bodily response.

The Window

A young couple moves into a new neighborhood. The next morning, while they are eating breakfast, the young wife sees her neighbor hang the wash outside.

"That laundry is not very clean," she said to her husband. "The neighbor doesn't know how to wash correctly. Perhaps she needs better laundry soap."

Her husband looked on, but remained silent.

Every time her neighbor hung her wash to dry, the young woman would make the same comments.

About one month later, the young woman was surprised to see a nice clean wash on her neighbor's line and said to her husband, "Look! She has learned how to wash correctly. I wonder who taught her this?"

The husband said, "I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows!"

Can you see how it might be a good idea to check first, to see if your windows are clean?

What we see when watching others depends on the purity of the windows through which we look.

Before we give any criticism, it might be a good idea to check our state of mind and ask ourselves if we are ready to see the good rather than just look for something wrong in the people we encounter. 

Kartik Bodawala --- India

Baggage at an Airport

Marlene

You arrive at the airport - try and check your baggage but are told it's too heavy. What could you leave behind?  Take a look at the picture.  What are you carrying around?  Why are you holding on to it?

 

We sometimes forget about the burdens we carry around from our past. Intellectually we know the past is over, we cannot change one thing yet we insist on bringing the weight with us as we travel through our lives.

 

Like cleaning out our closets, may I suggest that you look at cleaning out your life too? Let go of what you cannot change, it's not serving you well. Focus your eyes and life forward. Make today your best day and continue with that attitude each day you're given.

Bonds are bonding

Marlene

Bonds that happen between animals and people are sometimes as, if not more, powerful than between two people. Non-judgment and unconditional love can help heal a life and allow a person to go back into the world and enjoy the new confidence and respect they have found.

Surviving Lifes Obstacles

Dr. Wendy S. Harpham is a 27 year cancer survivor dedicating her life work to helping patients get good care and live their life as Healthy Survivors.

 

I believe everyone's life has been touched by someone they know who has or had cancer. My own cousin's wife fought the battle with ovarian cancer for 26 years and was one of the most loving, kind and warrior like people I have ever known.

 

This quote for today is to acknowledge and honor all who have struggled with this fight. We care about you, we admire your tenacity and perseverance, your faith and hope and so much more.

 

If you know someone who is in this battle, reach out to them today. Open your heart and let them know you care and are there for them.

 

Make a difference in someone's life - it's easy.  All you have to do is show up.

Limitations

 

Marlene

Several people are forced to be satisfied with their current situation, not understanding that they have the power to make a change for the better. You never know what you can do until you try, so go ahead and give it a shot!

Perception Faults

Marlene

Perception is your view of reality, yet sometimes your perception is not exactly 100% right. Could there also be hidden facts you know nothing about at the time? When you are too quick to label, you could miss the meaning of the experience now and later.

Who Controls You and Your Emotions?

What Feelings Are Inside Of You?

I was speaking with a good friend today about how her husband really brings out the worst in her. My thought after I hung up the phone was: if it wasn't inside, it couldn't come out. It was as if she was blaming her husband for her anger. No one can make something come out that is not already inside.

Before going to bed I asked myself, "What can I do to explain this to my friend?" I let it go and went to sleep. Low and behold at 3:45 a.m. a quote came to me I heard years ago by Dr. Wayne Dyer. I quickly scurried out of bed to look up exactly what he said to share it with her today. This is what I found.

"When you squeeze an orange, orange juice comes out - because that's what's inside. When you are squeezed, what comes out is what is inside."

This was also part of it:

"Did you ever hear a kid curse in front of their parents and then respond, "I slipped up?" They didn't slip up; they slipped out what was in. Those words had to be in you, to come out of you.

The results that you're getting in your life aren't an accident; those results are based on what's inside of you. You have to change the inside, if you want change, and you change the inside by changing what you spend your time thinking about. When you spend your time focusing on good things, then good things will come out of you.

We all know my belief is: whatever you focus on - positive or negative - is what you will get, so focus on the positive. That is what the last line reminded me of. I feel this was such a wonderful life lesson learned and I want to share it hoping it will shed light on her situation and make her think about it. Maybe it will make you think, too, as you are reading this. Just the thought put me back on the right track.

I remember an ex of mine would get really mad over a certain situation and say, "I'm not usually like this". He would carry on and go off about a certain subject and say, "I don't get like this" etc. From all I learned in life, if you are like that at the moment, you can't say you are not; it's what is inside of you coming out.

Dr. Wayne Dyer also said - An orange is an orange, whether you paint it yellow or call it a lemon; if you squeeze it you will still get orange juice. A person can think they have changed an emotion or gotten over something but if something affects them and makes them that angry, it's still inside of them.

Like with an orange; if you squeeze it, you put all your weight on it, and it bursts - you are going to get juice inevitably. With people, if anger is inside and someone says or does things that create pressure for them or makes them feel like they are going to 'explode' and they have that 'explosion' waiting to erupt inside of them - they will 'explode'. If the anger is inside, it will happen again until they clear it up.

It's when we are going through those types of moments we realize what is inside us. How wonderful is that? My friend calls that an AFGO. Acronym for Another F$%king Growth Opportunity. I love that. Please excuse my French!

Really give thought to how you react to situations. Do you get mad, angry, upset? Do you say "he got me angry" or "she makes me so angry, I just explode"?

I've written many times about how I do my best not to let things bother me (as much as humanly possible of course) such as someone driving too slow or driving two inches from my bumper or even cutting me off in traffic. I learned a long time ago, when listening to one of my personal development CD's - it's not worth it. If I get angry and allow this person to affect my day and they are oblivious going along about their day - who is this hurting? Not letting these types of situations cause anxiety is really what helps me to keep things in perspective and not get upset.

Ask yourself a few questions.

Is that person who comes out when you explode the real you?

What else sets you off? Your parents? Your kids? Your animals? Your boss? Your job? Really think about this.

If so, what is it in you making that happen?

Do you see something in this other person you see in yourself?

They say we are all mirrors for each other. Sometimes someone in our present brings back something we didn't like about ourselves in the past. If you are getting angry at them for that, maybe you haven't fully forgiven yourself yet. It's amazing how once we forgive ourselves we don't get as angry with others. Just saying.

I learned a long time ago to take 100% responsibility for all my emotions, feelings, and actions. So isn't it my responsibility to take ownership of my emotions and not try to justify them by blaming someone else for causing them?

Yes. If I admit that to myself then I can begin on a more positive journey. I can change my negative patterns and behaviors to more positive ones. Once you own it, you have power and control over it. This is something that can be changed so sometimes there just needs to be courage to change the things you can in order to get that piece of mind. I know I want to become the champion not the loser.

When this thought came to my mind this morning, I got up immediately to look up something from Dr. Wayne Dyer and this is what I found that I felt would help. I do my best to practice this most of my life now. I'm human and I don't do it always but I do my very best to live, as said so wonderfully below, by one of my favorite mentors.

Love Your Enemy?

8/3/11 at 10:30 am by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

The poet Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote, "If we could read the secret history of our enemies we would find in each man's sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility."

Harboring anger and hatred toward anyone guarantees that you remain in low energy fields where problems will continue to crop up repeatedly in your life. Try examining every relationship in which you feel judgmental thoughts of anger and hatred. Replace those thoughts with energies of acceptance, kindness, cheerfulness, and love. You will have to make a personal commitment to, first of all, notice what you are feeling and then exercise your ability to choose to send love.

When your heart becomes pure, your enemy becomes your friend, or even more significantly, your teacher. Your worst enemies are your greatest teachers because they allow you to examine the emotions of anger and revenge and then to transcend them. They give you the exact tools you need to elevate yourself to the spiritual energies that eliminate problems and provide solutions.

When you send love in response to hate you accomplish one of the most difficult things for anyone. As I look into my conscience I can now honestly say, I have no one who I can call an enemy. Over the course of my life I have been disappointed many times. Some have borrowed and never repaid. Some have forgotten their promises. Some have left me for others. Some have cursed me and spread rumors about me. Some have stolen from me. I send love to them all, mindful of the Buddha's words:

"We live happily indeed, not hating those who hate us. Among men who hate us we dwell free from hatred."

It has been this transformation in my own thinking, perhaps more than anything else, that has allowed me to move out of those low energy problem regions of my life. It is a powerful strategy for raising your spiritual awareness.

Isn't that great? I truly do my best to live by this thought process and had to remind myself that as my friend was was telling me her story because I started feeling something come up in me and instead I am now sending her husband love and light as I do with most situations.

This practice had truly made my life so enriched; problems and situations that would normally make someone nuts aren't as bad for me most of the time. It makes transitions smoother and life a lot more calm and peaceful.

As a matter of fact, when I'm going through situations with others who are going off on a tangent, I usually just stay calm and it drives them nuts. It's who I've become. I grew up in the Bronx so I experienced anger. I experienced rage. I experienced anger in my own home so I know what it's like. I choose to send love and peace as Pollyanna as that sounds.

"What we think determines what happens to us, so if we want to change our lives, we need to stretch our minds."

--- Wayne Dyer

Thanks for reading. I hope you got something out of this.

Copyright © 2012 Marion Licchiello

Marion Licchiello is a Writer, Self Empowerment Coach and an Intuitive Coach. She blogs for the Poughkeepsie Journal about getting motivated, staying positive, and getting fit.

Forward looking

Marlene

As long as you're going forward, looking ahead rather than behind, you can make it. Don't give up; there's so much more you can learn.

Positive Thoughts

Marlene

You've learned about the Power of Positive Thinking, how your thoughts affect you and your life. The same goes for The Power Of Negative Thinking. Be careful what you are focusing on. Always ask yourself this: Is this thought hurting or helping my life? Then... you will know what to do.

Right decision

Marlene

How many times have you made a decision that was right? A lot, of that I'm sure. Yet have you ever found yourself more attached to being right rather than doing the right thing?

Most people I know, including myself, have made decisions that weren't the best for the situation. We mess up. The difference is do you change your mind and go forward or stick with your decision even though you know it's not going to work out? Don't hang onto bad decisions - admit you're wrong and look for a new avenue.

Put one foot in front of the other

Marlene

One foot in front of the other, one step at a time, focus on where you want to go, not where you've been because today is all that matters. Have you started yet or are you ready to begin?

When you make the decision to go forward, everything changes. You've made a commitment and nothing will stop you from fulfilling your goal. Will there be setbacks? Good chance. Will there be amazing moments? Absolutely! Will it be worth it? Only you can decide.

Success Is A Matter Of Decision

(Note:Something to think about: How much do you really have control over? --- Marlene)

Since we are talking about our life and our future, inevitably and ultimately we have to make certain decisions. Decisions are about making the right choices (Nobody wants to make the wrong choices anyway). No matter how hard pressed we are, we have to know that we have choices. We just have to decide which course to take.

Whichever course we choose, there will be consequences waiting for us, be it good or be it bad. The choices we make today will color the spectrum of our life in the future.

We may dream of "flying to the moon and play with the stars" but before we could do that, we need to do certain things first. We certainly could not wait for the moon to fall on our lap. We need to set our dreams, choose the right vehicle to achieve our dreams, transform our dreams into tangible goals and last but not least, we need to act fast as if our life depends on it.

Do I consider myself idealistic? Hmmm ... I do not know.

Happy at Work

Marlene

Think about your work. Your autograph is on it. Are you happy to sign it knowing you did the best you could? Was the way you approached and executed the work filled with joy, confidence, integrity and compassion? If not, why not?

No matter what your position is, it's important. Everyone is part of the team and the way you do your part either helps or hurts the outcome. If it's not your dream job, act like it is until you find something else. Don't complain. Be a good example.

Customers World

Marlene

Learn about your customers' world. Stay on top of news that may affect their business. Find out what is important to them and help them achieve it. You never know how great the relationship can turn out to be.

Start one minute at a time.

Marlene

What can you do to make your next interaction positive? What can you do to improve a situation? Maybe it's a smile, a laugh, a word of encouragement. Perhaps it's holding someone's hand or giving them a hug.

There are so many ways to make a positive impact. Challenge yourself and see what you can come up with. Then tomorrow and the day after that, do it again. When we add repetition to an activity, over time, it becomes a natural event or as some say "a habit".

Don't worry

Of course everyone worries sometimes and for good reasons. Do you realize that worrying doesn't solve anything? Most of the time we worry about things that are out of our control. When we are concerned, we are more apt to take action or develop a plan and then put the plan into place.

Explore how you feel about worry and concern and if your response to each one is what you really want to do.

Happiness

Marlene

Today is where the good life lives - your life. Be Happy Now! Make the most of each moment, enjoying the people in your life and look forward to the future. When you stay in the moment,  you don't miss the small acts of kindness that come your way; and they are there, always.

Get ready for a fantastic day; it awaits you. Choose to accept it and share it with as many as you can.

An Act of Total Forgiveness

By Glen Michael Robinson

My name is Glen Michael Robinson and I've been employed for the past 23 years with the Marion County Sheriff's Office in Ocala, FL. I've never seen a mother respond to the death of her child the way this mother did.

Her son was killed on his third birthday when he chased a ball in the road in front of his house and was struck by a car. Her resolve to remain calm while everything around her was falling apart was an inspiration to me.

I asked her if she knew where the mother was. I'll never forget the calm expression on her face as she looked at me and told me, "I am the mother." She was a source of strength for me.

Courage

Marlene

Everyone will have their time to be courageous, many more than once. Look around at the people you know who have encountered situations that require their strength to make it through. Maybe it's been you, or someone in your family. Remember, you never really know what someone has faced. Open your heart today and recognize the courage in their souls.

Self-Respect and Appreciation Allows You To Offer Wonderful Gifts To Others

 
Once when I was a teenager, my father and I were standing in line to buy tickets for the circus. Finally, there was only one family between us and the ticket counter.
This family made a big impression on me. There were eight children, all probably under the age of 12. You could tell they didn't have a lot of money. Their clothes were not expensive, but they were clean.
The children were well-behaved, all of them standing in line, two-by- two behind their parents, holding hands. They were excitedly jabbering about the clowns, elephants and other acts they would see that night. One could sense they had never been to the circus before. It promised to be a highlight of their young lives.
The father and mother were at the head of the pack standing proud as could be. The mother was holding her husband's hand, looking up at him as if to say, "You're my knight in shining armor." He was smiling and basking in pride, looking at her as if to reply, "You got that right."
The ticket lady asked the father how many tickets he wanted. He proudly responded, "Please let me buy eight children's tickets and two adult tickets so I can take my family to the circus."
The ticket lady quoted the price. The man's wife let go of his hand, her head dropped, the man's lip began to quiver. The father leaned a little closer and asked, "How much did you say?"
The ticket lady again quoted the price. The man didn't have enough money.
How was he supposed to turn and tell his eight kids that he didn't have enough money to take them to the circus?
Seeing what was going on, my dad put his hand into his pocket, pulled out a $20 bill and dropped it on the ground. (We were not wealthy in any sense of the word!) My father reached down, picked up the bill, tapped the man on the shoulder and said, "Excuse me, sir, this fell out of your pocket."
The man knew what was going on. He wasn't begging for a handout but certainly appreciated the help in a desperate, heartbreaking, embarrassing situation. He looked straight into my dad's eyes, took my dad's hand in both of his, squeezed tightly onto the $20 bill, and with his lip quivering and a tear streaming down his cheek, he replied, "Thank you, thank you, sir. This really means a lot to me and my family."
My father and I went back to our car and drove home. We didn't go to the circus that night, but we didn't go without.
Anonymous --- Submitted by Jeff Pappas --- Texas
Read more at https://motivateus.com/stories/circus.htm#8DXTSdORKkGKyBoh.99

Think

Marlene

What do you think? I've known many people who never seemed to bloom in their thinking as they got older. They seemed to stay with what was familiar to them, rather than look at what could be and is possible.

When you don't learn from your experiences, you may find yourself repeating the same mistakes over and over again. Wisdom is taking the experience, looking for the lesson and changing your ways to one that will benefit you, not hurt you, again.

Acceptance

This morning I had to report for potential jury duty. I accepted the fact that I might be there all day. Once I did, I relaxed and enjoyed the moments leading up to our dismissal - a deal was struck.

Imagine how you would feel sitting there waiting. Would you have been agitated, upset, or angry? By accepting what is, you can move onto "Where and what do I need to do next?"

Hope your day is incredible and that acceptance for what is helps you move on to what could be!

Greatness of your Life

Your always adding to the greatness of your life. No matter who you meet, what decisions you make, you will always improve upon yourself and what you were in the past. Make each second of every day count, for it will never return. Live without regrets and always have a smile on your face. Every interaction you have adds to the masterpiece that exists in your very being.
#piccadillyinc

Possiblities are Endless

Marlene

Look at the good all around you; what was once impossible is now a reality. How does that happen? Work, faith, trust and a knowing that when you change your thoughts, you change your life. 

Everything is possible; tap into the incredible goodness that is waiting for you. It's there, ask anyone who has experienced success or a miracle.

Elderly are the link to History

Marlene

Yes the elderly do link us to history and... they have wisdom from years of experience that we don't have yet. What are a few pieces of insight they could share with you?

After reading several articles on this topic, I picked one by Nico Pitney. He writes about a gerontologist who interviewed 1500+ Elders for their advice on living and loving. Here are a few highlights and a link to the full article.

One of the biggest regrets of the very old was, I wish I hadn't spent so much time worrying.

If you lose yourself in the middle-age blur of work and kids, you really won't do your kids any good.

How you respond if your partner interrupts you while you're doing something is very diagnostic of how good the relationship's going to be.

Towards the end of life, what's really important to people is to be able to see how their life mattered, how it was meaningful, how there was a story to it that wraps up in a good way.

Strategies For Building Self-Esteem

While thinking about the Topic of the Week, I came across this wonderful article on Self-Esteem.

What is Self-Esteem?

Most people's thoughts and feelings about themselves fluctuate somewhat based on their daily experiences. The grade you get on an exam, how your friends treat you, ups and downs in a romantic relationship can all have a temporary impact on how you feel about yourself.

Your self-esteem, however, is something more fundamental than the normal ups and downs associated with situational changes. For people with good self-esteem, normal ups and downs may lead to temporary fluctuations in how they feel about themselves, but only to a limited extent. In contrast, for people with poor self-esteem, these ups and downs drastically impact the way they see themselves.

Okay?

Hard work

Marlene

Yes, the work was hard!  The results were impressive.  He continues to train so that he can maintain what he worked so hard to do.

You can do it too!  Just start and then continue one day at a time.  You will get there; have faith in yourself, believe in yourself and know you CAN do it!

 Be fearless today and take care!

Plan

Marlene

No plan?  No direction!  Would you attempt to build your house without a plan?  Of course not; unless you want to waste your time and money.  If what I suggested is true, why wouldn't you have a plan for your days?  Surely you want to be ready and set to go each day to accomplish what your heart desires.

If you make having a plan a part of your daily routine, it will be come a habit in no time at all.  This is YOUR future and you get to set the direction you want to take each and every day.

LEVELS OF REALITY

John Perry

If you think about it, reality comes in many levels, each level involving different kinds of things, having different kinds of properties. Perhaps most people would think of things like dirt at the bottom level, then us at the next level, and the sky at the highest level. But philosophers have a different, more abstract concept of levels of reality. Here are some examples:
• You and I---or at least our bodies--- along with tables and chairs and cities and towns and planets. This is what philosophers call the level of medium size objects. This level of reality is what most of our lives are concerned with. The sorts of things we can perceive with our senses, and so forth.
• Contrast that with a level called quantum reality. Objects like quarks that we can’t see, having properties like spin that we can barely make sense of.
• On the level just above quantum physics, we find electrons and atoms; then there’s the level of chemical facts, where you have chemicals and bonds; then the level of biology, where you have cells.
• Higher levels too, like maybe involving minds, societies, nations…
• And there are angels and God… and numbers for that matter. So we’ve got lots of levels!
Intuitively each level has a characteristic kind of object, characteristic kinds of properties and facts, and usually a different profession for people that study or work with it: quantum physicists, solid-state physicists, chemists, biologists, psychologists, sociologists. Nearer the top, mathematicians and theologians. And then, at least according to Aristotle, at the very top: philoophers. He put philosophers there because we think about Being --- that is, the whole shebang, and we try to figure out how the different levels are related. Most contemporary philosophers feel more in the middle than at the top. And their approach to the issue of levels of reality focuses on the topic of reduction.

We can set God and the angels aside; philosophers who believe in them aren’t likely to suppose they are reducible to something else, and those who don’t believe in them don’t worry about their reducibility either. We can also set numbers aside, since neither Ken nor I have any firm ideas about them. Then, physicalists like Ken and I both tend to be, think that the rest must be one big reality, physical reality. Facts about chemicals really are just facts about atoms and electrons, and they are really just facts about subatomic particles, or whatever else turns out to be at the bottom. And the same with biology and chemistry; psychology and biology; sociology and psychology.
The divisions are based on how humans interact with the different phenomena, the tools we use, the interests we have, and, of course, the National Science Foundation budgets involved. and Ultimately, metaphysically, philohically, there is just one reality, matter in motion --- or whatever quantum physicists replace matter with, or whatever they replace motion with.
One might think of this as depressing and mysterious. I don’t feel like a complex of quarks. Of course, there is another theory. It’s the competitor to Reductionism. It’s called Emergence. That’s the idea that each level in some way emerges from the one below, under certain conditions. And when emergence happens, truly new objects, properties, and facts are involved.
One might favor reductionism over emergence on the basis that in some cases, the reductions though not yet discovered,  are in principle to be had.  Biologists have known since Mendel that something, which they called `genes', are responsible for inherited characteristics. But for a long time, there were debates about whether genes could really be explained by physical and chemical properties. Many biologists thought that genes could never be fully explained just in terms of physics and chemistry.   They thought, in other words, genes were emergent, and not reducible. But with the discovery of DNA and the development of molecular biology, we know this isn't so. The structure that Watson and Crick discovered has allowed scientists to explain how genes work without appealing to anything but the principles and properties of physics and chemistry.
If everywhere some philosophers see emergence, scientists will eventually provide reductions, emergence will just be another idea in the dust-bin called the history of philosophy. But that grand result would require a biological understanding of consciousness and all the other mental phenomena. Should would-be physicalists like Ken and I really be so confident of that? Is it so obvious that it even makes sense?
Luckily we have an expert on all of this to help us think about it, Tim O’Connor, author of Theism and Ultimate Explanation.

Kindness

Marlene

Be the first one to offer kindness and care along with  compassion and love.  You'll never regret a day that you do and you just may change someone's life by providing them hope in humanity.

Try your best

Marlene

Do you try to do the best in all you do? Sometimes? What holds you back from doing it all the time? It really is amazing at what you can accomplish if you do it to the best of your ability.

What do you have to do if you want to improve on your results? Get more training and practice what you learned over and over again until it becomes second nature.

When I first started Motivateus.com I knew very little about how to code, how to use graphics programs, what SEO was all about, and a lot more. I could have given up and done something else, but I was determined to learn more, practice and improve. I believe, if you need to, you can do the same.

I'll never be the best at graphics but everyday I give the best to each picture or project. My hope is that today, if you haven't already, you will decide to give your best in all you do. Take care and have a great day!

Retraining Deeply Ingrained Habits of Mindlessness BY LEO BABAUTA

It’s hard enough to change a habit that you can physically see: going for a daily walk, sitting down to write, having a salad for lunch each day. These are easily seen, but can still be quite a challenge to instill in your life.

But what about habits of mindlessness, that you don’t even know you’re doing? Maybe you notice it later, maybe you never notice. How do you change those kinds of habits?
For myself, I have a number of mindless habits that I could focus on:

Judging other people

Eating mindlessly, especially when I’m talking to people or watching TV

Sitting too long and getting distracted online

Comparing myself to others or judging myself

Shutting down into self-concern when someone is unhappy with me

Hiding things from others because I’m ashamed or afraid for them to know

Of course, these are just a handful that stand out. They’re deeply ingrained, because I’ve had them since childhood.
They are not a reason to beat myself up, or judge myself. There is nothing wrong with me for having these habits. And yet I can see how they’re unhelpful to my happiness, to my relationships, to the work I want to do in the world.
So it would be helpful to retrain these mindless habits.
How do we go about that?

What to Know About Changing Mindless Habits

Before we start, it’s important to know that there are two big obstacles to changing these kinds of habits:

They are deeply ingrained. You’ve been doing them for years — reinforcing them for years — and so you won’t just be able to flip a switch and change them in a day or a week. It could take months to retrain, and in some cases, longer — depending on how much focus you give this retraining, and how consistent you’re able to be.

They are unconscious. If you don’t know you’re doing it, you can’t retrain it. It just keeps happening without you being able to do it. Without awareness, you’re powerless.

So it will likely be a messy process, with starts and stops, lots of “failures” that aren’t really failures if you’re using them to learn and grow your awareness. It can get discouraging, unless you look at every failure in this way, as a necessary step to becoming more aware, a necessary stepping stone to crossing this river.

A Retraining Method for Mindless Habits

With the above ideas in mind, here’s how we might retrain these mindless habits:

Focus on just one habit. Look at my list of mindless habits above — these all seem like great candidates to take on immediately. So why not do them all at once, right? But it’s hard enough to be aware of just one of these habits — trying to be aware of several habits at once is like trying to pay attention to 5 televisions at once. I’d say it’s impossible. Pick just one — you can get to all of them eventually.

Recognize the habit’s effects on you. Before you get started, reflect on how this habit affects you. Maybe just watch it for a few days and see how it affects your happiness, relationships, and the meaningful work you’re doing in the world. Start to get very clear on exactly what this habit does to your life, and all of the ripples it has on all parts of your life. Then get clear that you don’t want to keep doing this to yourself and others around you. You can’t afford it.

Create a practice container to give it focus and create awareness. With focus on one habit and clarity about what it does, you can now set up your retraining practice dojo. Here’s the key: create a space where you become as aware as possible of the habit. For example, if I wanted to work on the “being judgmental of others” habit, I might have a practice hour each day where I walk around in public looking at people and noticing when I have the tendency to judge them. I’m actively watching for the habit. Maybe it’s just 30 minutes, or 5 minutes, depending on the habit. But it has a defined start and end, and I’m very deliberately practicing during this time. I can slowly expand it over time, or have multiple practice sessions a day, but it shouldn’t be all day long. Sometimes I might shrink it. The key is to try to be as aware as possible during this practice container. 

Imagine an alternative habit that would be more helpful. What would be a more helpful habit to do instead? For example, instead of judging people, I might try to look at them with compassionate eyes. Instead of eating mindlessly, I might try to fully savor each bite, pausing in between to ask if taking another bite would be a loving act or just mindless satisfying of cravings. Instead of sitting too long, I might have focused work sessions for 15 minutes, getting up and exercising or stretching in between. Instead of comparing myself or judging myself, I might see myself with loving eyes. Instead of shutting down when someone is unhappy with me, I might try to see their pain and what they’re going through. Instead of hiding things from others, I might be open and vulnerable about what I’ve been hiding. These are only examples — take a little time to imagine the habit you’d rather have.

When you notice yourself doing the old habit, practice the new one instead. This one is obvious — during your practice session, if you notice yourself starting to do the old habit, do the new one instead, as deliberately and consciously as you can. Every single time, as consistently as possible. If you don’t do it consistently, just notice when you don’t, just increase awareness.

Repeat many times. This one is obvious too — repeat it often, until it becomes easier and more natural and more and more automatic. Reinforce each time you do it by giving yourself a mental pat on the back — feeling good about this success, even if it’s not perfect. Take a moment to feel grateful for your effort.

Then learn to do the new habit earlier. With some practice, you can learn to do the new habit much earlier in the process. For example, instead of judging someone and then switching to seeing them with compassion … I might look at someone and immediately try to see them with compassion, as soon as I see them. This takes a lot of awareness and practice, but it gets easier with time. You’re cutting out the old habit completely, so that the new one gets reinforced.

Repeat many more times. Again, repeat this method as many times as it takes to become more and more automatic. You might add additional practice sessions. You can even try to catch yourself outside of the practice sessions, until it becomes really easy to be aware of this during the day.

Important: see every mistake as a stepping stone to greater awareness. Remember that you’re not going to be perfect at this. It’s going to be messy. The old habit has been strengthened over years. Develop patience with yourself, understanding, compassion. Learn to encourage yourself when things are hard. And see every failure as information to use to get better and better.

This is the method. It works, I promise — I’ve changed some difficult habits this way, even if it took me longer than I’d care to admit. I’m still working with this method, in spurts and starts, in a very messy way. But shift happens. It can for you as well!

POSTED: THURSDAY, AUGUST 15, 2019

PREVIOUS POST: THE PRACTICE OF LISTENING TO FIND PURPOSE

Thought

Thought is like a river. It flows from each of us into one huge collective force. It's strengths has superiority to any of man's inventions. It has unseen greatness as well as magnificent beauty. It's power lies within each of us. We just have to learn how to magnify its significance. 

#piccadillyinc 

Curiosity

Curiosity is what leads us to knowledge. Knowledge is a powerful asset. When you are curious, you are creating, when you are creating are thinking. So in a sense curiosity leads to thought.

#piccadillyinc 

Life of a Salesman

Marlene

Everybody is in sales whether you know it or not. Think about your life and all the people in it. Every day you create, strengthen or diminish your relationships by how you interact with others.

Be the one who encourages, compliments and helps someone today. They're not going to get a fat head because of what you say to them. They will think you're pretty terrific and will enjoy the experience.

The Courageous Self-Discipline Challenge

BY LEO BABAUTA

Who among us doesn’t procrastinate? Who comes up with a wonderfully prioritized plan for the day and sticks to it, without putting off the hard stuff and running to distraction or busywork or comfort?
There may be some of you out there who are incredibly disciplined, but I’d say it’s fairly uncommon.
Most of us have trouble with distractions, with doing busywork instead of important work, with going to our comforts like TV, shopping, social media, with procrastination and putting off good habits.
If you recognize yourself in that description, I invite you to join my Courageous Self-Discipline Challenge for August.
I’ll be holding the challenge (starting Monday) in my Sea Change Program, where more than a thousand people will be doing it together, supporting each other.
How will the challenge work? You’ll commit to the challenge publicly (within the Sea Change community), and then do some daily challenges that will have different focuses each week. There will be weekly check-ins to give you accountability, and a live video webinar.
Here are the weekly focuses:

Week 1: Set commitment & intentions, and start.

Week 2: Deepen commitment & focus.

Week 3: Play with your pattern.

Week 4: Find joy in the discipline.

Each week, there will be an article talking about the weekly focus, with instructions for how to do that week’s focus.
You can ask questions in our Sea Change community, and ask me a question directly in the live video webinar.

Negative verses Positive

People focus on the negative. It is in the media. Negativity sells, however positivity should sell more. Don't you as an individual like to be happy. So let's have an experiment, let's see how long you can stay in a good mood and spread the joy around. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Making Waves

We get so caught up in making a difference that we forget what we are fighting for. Order, structure and freedom are all well and good, however we need to organize our order and make our structure have stability or it will falter. If you falter to much in life you can't succeed in accomplishing your highest aspirations. When you focus your energies and become one with your internal being you can accomplish anything you set your mind on. So don't just drudge through life lead by an expressively willed individual, known as yourself. You can achieve anything all you have to do is try. yeremiah@aol.com Yeremiah Hardt

Price

Marlene 

There are things in life you cannot buy – there is no price to pay – qualities of a person you will have a relationship with. Which ones mean the most to you?

Read more at https://motivateus.com/quote-of-the-day/3-qualities-you-cannot-buy/#U6ZH165aOKP4FxZe.99

The Story Of Life

Recently "Life" presented a gift to me; a lesson to teach me about my arrogance. I failed to see the beauty in each day, the value of a friend.... and more.

What lessons will be shared that can have an impact on your life too?

Read more of The Story Of Life.

Respect

Respect is a huge word with many different meanings.  Most of us know what disrespect feels like but can't seem to define respect so I found this article on Entrepreneur.com that I think helps:  Here are 7 Qualities of People Who Are Highly Respected:

Be polite. Always be polite to everyone you meet during the day, from your family members to your co-workers, to the checkout person at the grocery store.

Act respectfully.

Listen well.

Be helpful.

Don't make excuses.

Let go of anger.

Be willing to change.

Read a bit more:
What Is Respect?

The Greatest Gift A Human Can Possess

Marlene

You know you have gifts and talents, some that others don't have. But there is a gift all of us has - do we use it to its full potential?

Writer Michael Levy shares a beautiful little story to emphasize this power and what the effects can be. Read more about The Wizard's Secret Power. 

Don't let annoyances get you down?

Do you let little annoyances get you down, Yeremiah? It's been called "Sweating the Small Stuff" and sometimes we focus and hang on to these problems and forget what our goal is.

As you get ready for the weekend, reflect a bit and ask yourself is this true for me? If so, you can change that; it's within your power.

 

LIKE A BOX OF CHOCOLATES-A SELF PORTRAIT

by Annette Hall - March 2001

I guess Forrest Gump's mom was right, "Life is like a box of chocolates, you are not sure what you are going to get." In a very pure sense physically and emotionally my ability level can change from one moment to the next. Sometimes I'm able to walk without any noticable limitations. At other times, I have to grope to get from one destination to another, use my walker to get around, or walk like a toddler or a monster. My speech is similarly fluctuating. Sometimes my voice is normal. At other times it is mechanical or robotic. I had, on several occasions, preface my calls, "Please don't hang up, I am not a machine." I have learned to do this, after having people hang up on me because they thought I was a tape or someone playing a joke on them. My voice also changes from being very juvenile, to broken speech (lacking noun-verb agreement articles or prepositional phrases), to sounding like I am Jamaican or Latino. I stutter so much at times, I sound like Porky Pig. Sometimes I sound like one of the Little Rascals. I'm like a box of chocolates, you don't know who your gonna get.

My personality or rather emotions also changes. Though my ability to reason and understand is in tact, at all times, the way I interact fluctuates. The maturity level goes from quite innocent to that of a child during "tender years" to that of a mature adult. During the former, I lack tackfulness and tend to say what I think (yet not with intent to harm). My accountability to others is like that of a child to parent. In fact, when I do things for which I know there is likely to be some negative feedback, I'll say something like "I'm going to be on punishment" or "I'm in trouble." Also my sensitivity level changes. When my voice is juvenile, I tend to have a toddler's form of behavioral responses. For example, I am subject to cry at the drop of a hat for something like being moderately corrected(scolded). Also just watching something on television (or in actuality) where there is sudden excitement, where someone gets hurt (even if comical)I will start to tremor, cry, my arms will move like the robot in  "Lost in Space" when he says "Danger, Danger, Will Robinson!!"

My life is like a box of chocolates, you don't know who you are going to get.

#piccadillyinc

Don't feel like a failure...

Marlene

Do you take failure personally? Do you hang on to the feelings it brought for too long a time?

 What if you looked at failure a completely different way? As an experience?Nothing lasts forever, not success and not failure. Everyone hits bumps in the road and sometimes the bumps are huge.

That's okay - we live and we learn from everything. Try not to criticize yourself too much when you fail; they say the more times you fail, the closer you get to success.

Take back your life

Marlene

Are you ready to take your life to a new level?  Accept that your decisions, based on your knowledge and attitude, direct your life.

Of course you may have circumstances that pose a challenge - we all do - yet we have to decide WHAT to do next.

When you blame others or circumstances all the time for how your life is working out, you give up your power.  Is that really what you want?

Just Two Tickets To Indy

By Rick Phillips

"The first time you accept 'good' is the last time you will see excellence."
--- John Ulmo

"We had talked about the possibility and it's ramifications for weeks as test after test failed to confirm or refute the diagnosis. But now we sat in my office crushed by the reality that it was true; John had ALS, Lou Gehrigs's disease. The insidious affliction strikes the muscular system of its victim, eventually draining the body of all strength to support even breathing and a beating heart.

John had been my business partner, my friend and my mentor for many years. He was the kind of friend who pushed you beyond what you thought you could do. John always saw you not for what you are but for what he thought you could be, and then he never let you settle for anything less. One time I objected to his expectations and he responded patiently, "Rick, I wouldn't be much of a friend if I let you settle for what you think is your best."

We sat in the office crying and holding hands like two adolescent children, realizing that the crippling death sentence would not allow John to live for more that two years. Finally, I asked him to think about the one thing he had always dreamed about doing, something that he had not done yet. Was there some event he would like to see with Bonnie, his loving partner? Would it be the running of the bulls in Spain or would he want to see the Great Wall of China, the Parthenon or the Wailing Wall?

 

His response was actually predictable. John was a lifelong car-racing enthusiast; he had always wanted to go to the Indianapolis 500. Unfortunately, it seemed that the tickets for the event were long tied up in corporate commitments or with fans that handed their seats down through the family as a legacy.

 

However, I confidently told John it would be no problem.

 

Really? How is that going to happen?   Let's continue:

https://motivateus.com/stories/tickets-to-Indy.htm